If you look at the history of demagoguery and fascism, it always happens when there are two things. It requires a gentle populace to allow it to happen, whether through laziness, ignorance or ineptitude, but it also requires a very angry, dissatisfied section of the populace who want egregiously simple answers to very complicated problems.
This blog post is sort of a mishmash of disparate observations over the past month or so. Life has been busy, but good busy. Mostly. Just living life as fully and completely as we can. Sharing time with one another and family and friends and a cute little dog.
I’m tidying up here in Worcester and Boston. After 3.5 years on this contract I will, to paraphrase King James, ‘be taking my talents to Florida’. Moffit Cancer Center needed a Program Director for their Workday Implementation and I was ready to move on. And so off we go to Tampa. Probably mid-January. By the time this blog hits the airwaves I will have resigned at UMass.
3.5 years is a long time for me. I generally am on a client for 2 years plus or minus. I have a childlike quality of constantly seeking to experience new things. To learn new things. To meet different colleagues, examine different technologies and industries and locales. So this ‘get er done and move on’ mentality suits my temperament.
I’ve enjoyed UMass up until the last 4 or 5 months. The re-org has not been kind and I think ultimately will continue to plague the organization. There is a toxicity that was not there a few months ago and it can be traced back to a single individual who, unfortunately, resides in my hierarchy. So that was a catalyst for sure. Combined with my natural inclination for change, the decision to take this new contract was a no-brainer.
I spent the night in Boston so I could be near the airport this morning. I am primarily a Marriott man these days so wound up at the Moxy so I could conform to the UMass hotel pricing guidelines. I don’t know what demographic this Marriott brand is targeting but it doesn’t seem to be working. I guess the young uns? 20’s and 30’s? But the place sucks. Sort of a Neo-industrial vibe. All hard and dark and shitty music playing everywhere. They seem to be trying so hard to be hip that they are tragically un-hip. Based on the sparse sightings of other humans I would say it’s probably a brand that will not survive long in the Marriott family.
Maybe I will switch to Hilton or IHG when I start anew in Tampa.
A military guy was in the TSA Pre-Check line ahead of me with his desert sand camo backpack. He had all kinds of inspirational patches reminding himself, and others I suppose, to be all you can be. Shit like ‘Be tough and strong and badass and good things will follow’. One patch however seemed a little out of place — it said ‘Don’t be average. Be a wolf’. I thought, what’s so wrong with average? Why put so much pressure on yourself? And even if everyone constantly strived to be above average it’s still the case that someone will be disappointed — there will still be below averages and averages. That’s just how shit goes down. Also, doesn’t the guy realize there are also, by definition, average wolves. Not sure what the measurement criteria is for wolves. Fierceness? Steps per day? Kills? But there are definitely wolves who are average in the wolf world. And wolves as a whole might well be considered average if measured against the awesome honey badger.
The TSA lady was in rare form. She admonished one guy for having two laptops. She said ‘she could not imagine why someone would need to travel with two laptops“. I sheepishly took out my two laptops as did the guy behind me. I’m guessing TSA people don’t need to travel with two laptops.
She was barking and just generally being pissy and harsh to everyone. She looked like a mean granny or an elderly librarian who had been passed over for promotion to head librarian so many times that she was resentful and angry at the world. But you know, TSA people have you by the balls when you’re in that line — there can be no accommodation for jackassery while perpetuating the illusion of airline safety.
Last night we had a nice team dinner at an old-school Italian joint named Piccolo’s. The waitress was a hardened crusty old broad who limped around the dining room with a scowl. We imagined she was the aunt of some local mob boss and everyone was afraid to fire her for fear of getting whacked. She was generally pretty unpleasant but the funniest thing was that when we asked for waters, she icily replied ‘okay I’ll bring water but you won’t drink it’. So came the water. Which we drank, although I had a fleeting thought she might have poisoned it. Alas, we all lived but she did not bring another ounce of water in spite of every empty water glass on the table. But I wasn’t going to complain. I didn’t want to get whacked.
But we laughed if off and had a nice dinner. Probably the last time I will see some of these folks.
Notes from earlier….
I’ve been on the mountain now for 3 days. It never gets old really. This morning the fog is complete. If you didn’t know there was a river down there, you’d never know there was a river down there. The fog also mutes sounds so it is eerily quiet. The rain has stopped but the deck is wet — the water beading and pooling on the planks — a testament to a job well done in my weatherproofing efforts. Fat drops of rain hang from the horizontal metal bars of the pig iron gates of the deck railing. Marti comes out and sticks her entire head through the fence to get an unimpeded view into the wet fog.
Back inside, the coffee is hot and delicious. A good book, and the dog sitting across from me, curled up in her chair sleeping. A perfect morning. It’s the little things.
The trick of course is how to carry this peace through the day. Through the onslaught of news coming from the dreadful election results and all the silliness of work meetings. The slow fatigue that sets in from meeting after meeting and the need to remain passively attentive even while I want to be working on MYO stuff or EmergingNamibia website or writing one of the two books I’m plodding through or walking the dog down the mountain to the creek or making sourdough bread or potato soup or chopping wood or doing chores around the homestead. There are things that bring peace and calm. There are things that we must do that disrupt that peace and bring anxiety and resentment and longing for some sort of different way of existing.
Last night was poker night. As usual, we had great conversation. Animated and spirited and this week mostly around our declining education system and the election outcomes. We are respectful of each other’s viewpoints. No one really considers poker night about poker. It’s about camaraderie and insightful discourse and seeking to understand the world we live in and where do we fit in this new world order. I enjoy these weekly get togethers although we are all so busy they have become less frequent. Not so much weekly now as monthly.
Matthew has a particular issue we discussed for a good long while. His two girls are of course academic superstars. Matthew is extremely smart and dedicated and no doubt his girls are high performers. But the public school system they attend recently implemented a lottery system for kids to gain attendance to the elite academies in that district where the education is a cut above the rest of the system. Matthew’s oldest did not get selected because it’s a lottery; not based on merit. So Matthew, who is among the most kind and gentle people I know, has put on the war paint. He has committed to attending every school board meeting and using his 3 minutes to point out the obvious shortcomings of this asinine approach. He is also filing FOI requests for specific data and has not ruled out legal action if necessary. It was spirited conversation with a much animated Matthew — who is normally a docile and gentle soul. On the other hand he does have an unhealthy fascination with Rocky so maybe there is a darker side to him.
From Matthew’s standpoint as a parent, it’s hard to believe that he is wrong. From any standpoint really. But of course the much larger issue is how do we get more equity in the education system. Kids who are born poor, who have inadequate prenatal and early childhood nutrition, who have fewer role models and less stable home lives and whose parents are more likely to have less education and a host of other issues that accompany impoverished neighborhoods (violence, drugs etc) simply are not going to compete with kids from families like Matthews. So should they not get any chances to get into a better school because they were born to unfortunate circumstances? The answer of course is a social structure that decreases levels of poverty and provides far more support for those who need it to ensure their children get proper nutrition, are shielded from violence and drugs and have the same access to pre-school education and after-school activities as families who are better off. Level the playing field before you get to the point of applying for elite academies and you don’t need a lottery system.
An intractable problem in a society that is continuing to move away from social parity and towards even more wealth inequality. The votes of the poor just elected a billionaire whose words and actions ensure we will see further erosion of social programs and an increase in disparity between the working poor and the oligarchs. It’s particularly discouraging that Matthew is experiencing this form of discrimination when he and his wife are so generous in donating to multiple charities and their church. He is all about social equity; but not a clumsy, arbitrary approach that punishes hard workers rather than lift up the lower performers.
It was warm enough that I sat outside for the poker chat. Marti prefers to remain inside for the most part, sitting in the chair by the window where she can keep an eye on me. Which I appreciate. Even those who love solitude like to have a little pet friend around to connect us back to other living beings.
Brittany and I had a nice dinner one Saturday night at Fireproof — a lovely Tapas style restaurant in Short North. Big news was there was a Nazi march in Short North earlier in the day. So it begins — the implicit threats from MAGA supporters that will now be tolerated because we have a fascist president elect.
But I am confused about who hates who in the MAGA world. I mean the Nazis presumably hate the jews but they also support Trump and Trump supports the jews. So WTF is happening. Do these guys even know who they hate or why?
I took Marti for a walk around the back fields of Easton. She remembers every place she ever saw a rabbit. Every place she ever saw a deer or raccoon — and each of these places must now be carefully re-examined.
One of the problem we have in America is that we have no moral center from which to draw ethical clarity. We have simply been an entitled nation of racist, sexists, privileged, brats since arriving on this continent. From the rape, torture, massive displacement, and attempted genocide of native Americans to slavery to Jim Crow, to Cambodia and Vietnam, Bay of Pigs, assassinations and political interference around the world, Jospeh McCarthy and ruining people’s lives over a meeting they may or may not have attended 30 years ago, Richard Nixon, Iran-Contra, illegal invasion of Iraq and Afghanistan etc. etc. ad nauseam. We are truly among the worst of the world and yet we proudly announce our moral superiority to anyone who will listen (which is a distinctly declining audience). And now, we bring you Trump act II. The cherry on top of a putrid accumulation of generations of hateful leaders and heartbreaking outcomes.
It’s important to keep in mind that there is no law in America that prevents someone from believing in communism or socialist ideals or belonging to a political party. We are supposed to be the land of free speech and free ideals. But that is not our history. In our history, those are just words. Our actions tell a different story. It’s also instructive to remember that during the Great Depression, a time preceded by massive wealth inequality and followed by massive hunger and poverty, there was widespread perception (not incorrectly), that capitalism was failing the average person. There was great poverty in the country at that time until FDR got some shit moving. Appalachia, parts of the south, and Native American reservations were particularly acutely affected. Who can present a credible argument today that capitalism serves all people in our country? Who can say we should not be looking to alternative economic models that more equitably distribute all the wealth generated by the masses? Who can defend that the top 8 or 10 richest people should have wealth equal to the bottom 50% of the world?
At least in America, it should not be a crime to speak your mind. To look to alternative political parties to represent your interests and beliefs. And yet, in the very recent past our own government has examined and imprisoned people who have spoken freely about our shortcomings and attempted to unite people in peaceful dissent. During the 50’s, McCarthy and co. persecuted anyone who had even a casual relationship with someone who might have attended a communist political gathering. It was guilt by association.
Anyone who thinks our government is reformed and is still not involved in massive spying against our own citizens is naive. The degree of invasion may ebb and flow with the specific vanity and insecurity of different administrations, but the protocols are in place and the manhunts and punishments can ramp up immediately. We also spy on our allies — remember Obama’s embarrassment when it was disclosed that we had bugged Angela Merkel’s phone. Oops. Sorry because we did it or sorry because we got caught?
Wikileaks and Snowden exposed thousands of instances of American illegal and unethical activities. Our behavior did not change but we are continuing to try to assassinate or prosecute the messengers who dared to drag our hypocrisy and dirty deeds into the sunlight.
Look to the CIA’s overthrow of government in Guatemala and Iran in the 50’s. We used force, propaganda (misinformation and fake news) and truckloads of American dollars for bribery. One example of many. But we remain convinced of our moral superiority.
I often get people, when I rail against US history, tell me ‘but we’re better than most other countries’. One, I don’t believe that to be true. I believe it’s what we tell ourselves and what we are taught in school. Two, our ethical compass should not be dictated by the actions of others in any case. Just because one country might have raped and killed and tortured more than us doesn’t mean we are great.
Anyway. What are you gonna do. I guess go to work, sit at my machine and pretend to be a good little worker so I can get my bit of candy and pretend like I am living a grand life.
Actually my life is pretty fucking grand — but my words are meant to speak for the millions who are so much unluckier than I am.
4:00am now and I am Brit’s waiting for the Uber to the airport for the trip to Boston and then to Worcester. Marti is curled up beside me. She prefers Brittany and I to be in the same room but when we’re not she goes back and forth. Doing her duty to watch over both of us and spread the puppy love.
Brittany and I had a nice long T-Giving weekend. Obvious Thursday then a nice night out on Saturday. We went to Due Amici, a nice Italian restaurant downtown, and then to Short North Theatre to see Jersey Boys. Afterwards we had a flight of espresso martinis at Soul at The Joseph Hotel. Thursday morning, Friday, and Sunday I bent my back into the hard work of cleaning out two garages. I got my motorcycles and convertible into Yvonne’s garage for storage and my garage mostly cleaned up. Now just need Terri to toss out the lifetime of junk she’s been storing for the day when junk somehow becomes magically profitable.
December is a whirlwind. Boston week 1. Black Dog Ridge week 2. Boston week 3. Florida week 4 and then back to West Virginia and finally Ohio. Marti will get her 3rd visit to Florida beaches.
The warm autumn is behind us and cold winter upon us.
Terri and I hosted our annual holiday party which was subdued this year but we checked the box. We had a big family dinner at The Barn at Rocky Fork Sunday night. Since we will be in Florida for Christmas I wanted us all to get together before we left. It was also Terri’s birthday dinner and she mostly slept through it. Photos below. I consider this blog, at least in part, a family chronology, so events are captured. Photos are taken. We will look back one day and laugh. Perhaps.
All told life is good. Better than I deserve but I’ll take it.
More soon, but for now no other news of note.
Humbly Submitted.
Robert Myres – Flanker, Portneuf Valley Rugby Football Club (ret.)
The Martini Tales 