Takin In The Heat

I’m going out the way I came in. broke, naked, and screaming.
Robert Myres, Poetry by another name; or – poems are just words motherfucker

A few times a year, I call up the video of Amanda Gorman reciting her poem, ‘The Hill We Climb’ at Biden’s inauguration. An absolute masterpiece. She became my hero that day.

It’s gone cold and rainy and misty on the mountain this afternoon. But I got my cord of wood cut early, before the weather turned against me. I’m no fan of Chris Columbus, but I’ll take the holiday. Now, time for a cigar and a thick Chocolate Stout before dinner. And a new book of poems by Bukowski. New to me. A book I picked up in Amsterdam a few weeks ago and been looking for the right time to get into it.

The wood cutting is hard duty. But it must be done if we are to enjoy fires. And we do. But it’s also satisfying work. It feels like work. I felled 3 ash trees that were ’standing dead’. The ash trees are all dying due to an invasive beetle. So they are a good choice for firewood. It’s probably not so wise to be up here dropping trees and doing a lot of saw work by myself. But I try to keep my phone handy in case something happens. Marti’s a fine hound, but she’s not lassie. She’s not going to go running to town to find help. But yesterday and today I cut and split two cords, so a decent start on the probably 10 cords or so I will likely need to get through the cold season.

The insanity of humans is hard to fathom. I sometimes think about how the trajectory of my life would have been very different if I were born 6 or 7 years earlier. I almost certainly would have gone to Vietnam. I was too immature and indoctrinated in those years of my life to have fled north. So I would have gone.

If I had survived, I would be a different person. Few people are ‘cut out’ for war. Certainly not me. The men who start wars rarely send their kids to the front lines. After WWI, the Great War, we were supposed to have learned. Then came II. Then Korean, Vietnam, Iraq 1, Iraq II, and Afghanistan. And that’s just the American wars. Now we must think of the death and destruction and hardship of the people of Ukraine because of Putin’s cruelty. And also the people of Israel and Palestine—pawns in a game of ego and ignorance.

A few men can destroy the lives of millions under the slimmest pretext that they represent the best interests their various populations.

All wars involve manipulating pawns against a few lunatics who think a few thousand acres of land will make them greater. Or some sort of power or riches. If I had found myself in that position, a pawn, forced to fight for my life and kill for their interests, I don’t think I could survive it. I’m too stubborn and too proud and too sensitive.

John McKay died. A friend. A good guy. We played rugby together for at least 20 years or so.

When I arrived in Pocatello Idaho in 1986, still in the Navy, John was one of the senior guys on the rugby team. Portneuf Valley Rugby Football Club. I was very confused at this period of my life. Very immature. I had no real identity of my own—just trying out different things and living in the moment with very little view of what might come the week after the one I was in. John was a grounding figure.

I had always thought I was a good athlete. It turned out I was good while swimming in a small pond. In a medium pond, I was at best a little above average. I never competed in a large pond successfully. John took some time to mentor me in a variety of ways. On the field, he helped me understand you can play at a high level of intensity but maintain discipline. I never got there fully, but I got a lot better after meeting John. He also helped me understand that rugby was much more than what happened on the field. It was a way of living life. The same traits that drew us to intense competition could be applied to become better at work. At relationships. At whatever we applied ourselves to. Discipline. Hard work. Thoughtfulness. Strategy and tactics. Composure. Integrity. John embodied all of these things. Quietly, and never seeking to bring attention to himself.

At Lowe’s one afternoon, a kindly older black gentleman helped me find the things I needed. Unfortunately he was wrong about everything. He sold me a 6” wire brush wood stove pipe cleaner as requested, but sold me the wrong size extension handle. When he handed me the handle, he gave me a little wink and said “This one will save you a little money over those over-priced brand extension rods.” Perhaps. But it doesn’t fit. So back I go. It’s a 45 minute drive both ways. But my stovepipes do need cleaned. He also got super confused on a high voltage receptacle I need so I kindly excused myself from his further help.

Then, checking out, I was a bit frustrated that they had no check out lanes open with a checker. Only self service. And I had a fair amount of stuff and was in a hurry because Marti was in the car and I don’t like to leave her long. I asked the lady monitoring self checkout if it was possible to open a lane and she said no. No further explanation. Reading my body language she then said “everyone’s going the same way—just the way it is”. So I said “is that your business model then? Just do what everyone else does”? She then said, and I quote “It’s actually the governments fault. They are making it a law to only have self checkouts”. No shit I said? The government laws says that? She said she heard it on the news. So it was then clear to me. West Virginia where Fox news is the only news. It’s the government mandate to use self-service checkout lanes. Really? She was sweet, but incomprehensibly dumb.

Brittany and I had steamed mussels for dinner one cold night. With freshly baked homemade bread. An amazing meal. Afterwards, I happened to chuck one of the mussel shells way off the back of the deck and part-way down the ridge. About 15 minutes later I find that mussel shell at the door. Marti had gone and found it in the trees and brush. What a nose on that little jungle fox.

The worm has turned. The corrupt greed heads and war mongers are back up to their evil deeds. Hamas attacked Israel and took a couple of hundred hostages. So Israel is bombing the fuck out of Palestine. As they do, and as these things go, the mighty and powerful return force at an insanely horrific degree of retribution. Israel will kill 10 for every 1 person they lost. And it is indiscriminate killing, so thousands of innocent civilians are already dead and they are just getting started. US did the same in Afghanistan and Iraq after 9/11 so this is not a unique situation. Our leaders seem to feel justified in killing poor and innocent — especially If their skin is darker than ours and they are not perceived as politically or economically important. So it’s very sad.

Brittany attended a protest about the Israel invasion in DC yesterday along with around 100,000 other people while I was at a board meeting of a new charity I am involved with. I met Dr. Sandra Johnson who has an amazing resume as a supercomputer genius. And her husband Leonard, who told his story of trying to get out of Namibia back during the war for independence. He was captured in Angola and spent the next 10 years in a refugee camp in Zambia and was nearly killed while trying to escape. The guy right in front of him had his head shot off and the guy behind him took several rounds but Leonard miraculously was not hit. They were rounded back up and returned to the camp. Leonard was finally selected for evacuation by an American aid program and after spending a week in the finest hotel in Lusaka, was flown first class on Pan Am to America where he got educated and has had a long and illustrious career with Cisco. Hell of a story.

Well, I was stranded in the jungle trying to take in all the heat they was giving

The night is dark but the sidewalk’s bright and lined with the light of the living
The Boss

So Leonard, Sandra, Benny and I have formed a new foundation focused on raising funds to support education and enrichment of youth in Namibia and ultimately other parts of Africa. We are trying to move quickly to establish our 501(c)3 so we can get started. It’s energizing as this is a gap I’ve been interested in trying to close for many years. We can finally have a path to helping MYO alumni with university fees and perhaps find other ways to help them get past the substantial barriers facing them in the impoverished country in which they live.

Brittany and I just got back to Black Dog Ridge from DC. Just relaxing now before the chaos of the work week is once again upon us. We will be here until Tuesday then back to Ohio. I am in Boston next week and then we head to Florida for a week to visit Brittany’s dad for Thanksgiving.

South Africa has won another world cup. Great tournament, although I felt France and Ireland should have had a better finish.